KNOWN AS:
Comedian
responsible for a variety of hugely popular characters, many of whom he has
played in TV commercials.
INTRODUCTION:
First
time round, Angus said he was used to being associated with slobs and halfwits,
so he would feel at home on this show; in his second appearance, Angus referred
to his association with "Nice But Dim" and "Slob", claiming
that he had bad notices but had still done okay.
BEST QUOTE:
Enfield
claimed that the tannoy at Waterloo station which Princess Anne wanted turned
off had just said: "The 8.15 from Purley is delayed - and Mark Phillips has
just got another woman up the duff!"
ANECDOTES: None.
GIVEN A HARD TIME?
Ian
pretended to vomit after Enfield pompously admitted that he was an opera buff,
before having his "You Don't Wanna Do That" character satirised
further by Ian on the subject of which opera to see.
OTHER OBSERVATIONS:
Enfield's
hair on the Christmas Special seemed to have a large chunk on the fringe
completely out of place with the rest. And
never before has a man looked so uncomfortable in a suit and tie, which he wore
on both occasions.
COMMENTS FROM THE WEBMASTER:
As
a character comic, Enfield has always worked to very tight scripts so it was a
joy to see he could improvise just as well.
On both occasions - but particularly the Christmas special - he was
quick, clever, biting, insulting, utterly rude and downright hysterical.
The Christmas special was one of those shows which went like a dream with
belly laughs from start to finish, in which Enfield put his twopenny worth in no
uncertain terms. A great guest.
MARKS OUT OF TEN: Nine and eight.
SHOULD THEY INVITE HIM BACK?
A suspicion that he may have peaked with his two appearances is apparent, but the man is a modern comedy legend and would at least equal those two displays if he returned, so definitely worth another call.
APPEARED:
KNOWN AS:
Fiery,
loudmouth comedian, now a successful Hollywood actor.
INTRODUCTION:
Angus
referred to his previous stage name of Bing Hitler, before changing it to the
absurd pseudonym of Craig Ferguson.
BEST QUOTE:
When
given the headline "KEEP DYING, YOU'RE ON VIDEO", he replied:
"That's a memo to the presentation staff of Sky Television."
ANECDOTES: None.
GIVEN A HARD TIME? No.
OTHER OBSERVATIONS:
Other
than he answered the questions with little fuss or digression, an unremarkable
performance.
COMMENTS FROM THE WEBMASTER:
When
Ferguson is at his very best on stage, he shouts and rants and really looks
genuinely angry and frightening, a characteristic which earned him fantastic
reviews and superstar status. Sadly, he was like a lamb on the programme,
not choosing to vent the fury and chagrin which had made his act so
unique. As a result, the audience missed out on seeing him perform to his
true strength.
MARKS OUT OF TEN: Six and a half.
SHOULD THEY INVITE HIM BACK?
He has ranted and raved on other shows since and been at his very best doing so, therefore he is worth another go. An angry Ferguson would steal the show time and again.
APPEARED:
KNOWN
AS:
With Bird, he is one half of the double act which sends up political life on
Rory Bremner's television shows.
INTRODUCTION:
First time round, Angus said he was a satirist named John who started at the
Establishment Club in the early 60s and now appears on the Rory Bremner show
(like fellow guest Bird); on his second appearance, Angus introduced he and John
Bird together as two comedians whose satirical outpourings late night on Channel
4 have brought pleasure and delight to literally dozens.
BEST QUOTE:
On the BBC's missing money, he said: "They mislaid about £20 million, and
people in
the accounts department were saying, 'You had it last'!"
ANECDOTES:
He
and Bird confirmed that they appeared on the pilot of "That Was The Week
That Was" but didn't get on the actual series.
GIVEN A HARD TIME?
No.
OTHER OBSERVATIONS:
Fortune was much quieter than comedy partner Bird in their first appearance,
though that didn't prevent him from contributing some fine observations and
cutting comments.
COMMENTS FROM THE WEBMASTER:
Richly comic and very subtle in his put-downs, Fortune put in an astute and
well-observed performance but was also quick to let others do the talking, hence
his silence in comparison to Bird, and he particularly enjoyed Paul's comments
during his first appearance, on a day when he was really on-form.
MARKS OUT OF TEN:
Eight and eight.
SHOULD THEY INVITE HIM BACK?
Absolutely
APPEARED:
KNOWN AS:
One half of comedy duo "The
Oblivion Boys", known for their lager ads in the 1980s, later became one of
the country's top improvisers on "Whose Line Is It Anyway?". Also a respected and successful stage and screen actor, and
currently a regular performer on BBC Radio 4's long-running word definition show
"Just A Minute".
INTRODUCTION:
On his first appearance, Angus delved through some of
Frost's more thespianic theatre work only to point out that his best known role
was as "Man 2" in the Carling Black Label adverts; second time round,
Angus said people would look at Frost's face and say "I bet he
drinks..." - just "I bet he drinks".
BEST QUOTE:
Given an odd one out of Tony Benn, Tony Blackburn,
Ronald McDonald and Emperor Bicassa, Frost said: "The odd one out is Ronald
McDonald, as Mr Bicassa's first name was Tony."
ANECDOTES: None.
GIVEN A HARD TIME? No.
OTHER OBSERVATIONS:
Appeared clean-shaven first time round, yet sported a
huge beard when he made his return. Frost
was also clearly stricken by an infamous remark made by Angus about Mother
Theresa, giving the host a clear thumbs down over the joke.
COMMENTS FROM THE WEBMASTER:
Frost has magnificent timing and a great comic heritage
which has gained him huge respect from his peers, if not while reaching the very
top of the tree. He was prepared to
answer the questions thoroughly and with minimum fuss, yet was always quick to
leap in with a gag where it mattered. Got on very well with Ian, who seemed to enjoy his humour. Having
said all that, his first appearance was considerably more impressive than his
second, for reasons which are undetectable. Presumably
he just had an off-day.
MARKS OUT OF TEN: Nine and six.
SHOULD THEY INVITE HIM BACK?
Absolutely. This man has great delivery and a keen eye for the news, and should be warmly welcomed back.
APPEARED:
KNOWN AS:
Uppercrust actor and comedian, star of numerous films
and TV series and known particularly for playing bumbling, lovable fools. Also
a hugely successful novelist.
INTRODUCTION:
On his first appearance, Angus claimed he was the man
who had done for celibacy what Bill Wyman hadn't; second time round, Angus read
a typically educated Fry quote, only to then correct the syntax of it; on his
third appearance, Angus said Fry drove around London in a taxi, though didn't
stop to pick people up, making him no different from the others.
BEST QUOTE:
Loads of them - when asked by Ian if he had been
invited to dinner with Woody Allen and Mia Farrow, Fry replied: "No. Not
at all. I think it's because I went to
bed with all their children.” Claimed
that the Queen had described Diana's biographer Andrew Morton as "an annus
horribilis.” When pressured
about his friendship with Prince Edward, Fry replied: "I have not
penetrated Prince Edward's intimate circle.”
Completed the headline "ANY FOOL CAN ______”
with "be made from gooseberries."
ANECDOTES:
None. In his
third appearance he told two elongated and entertaining stories, but neither of
them were actually about him.
GIVEN A HARD TIME?
Was teased about his active support for the Labour
Party when forced to answer a question about the 1992 Election defeat. As
he was invited to the wedding of Edward and Sophie, Angus questioned him
relentlessly about the gift list and the plans for the stag night to the extent
that Fry had to shout "Leave me alone!”
Was also forced to listen to a drab acoustic song called "Stephen
Fry” by a Brazilian artiste who
composed the tune about his infamous disappearance after the first night of a
West End play. Paul had a right go at him
afterwards, claiming the video simply featured lots of doors closing and people
searching worriedly.
OTHER OBSERVATIONS:
Though in possession of razor sharp wit and absolute
superstardom, Fry was humble throughout all shows, thanking the audience for
their applause and congratulating others on getting difficult questions correct.
He is also incredibly detailed when
identifying stories.
COMMENTS FROM THE WEBMASTER:
Notice that unlike everyone else who has guested,
several Fry quotes have been mentioned above. This
is simply because his first two performances rank, in this opinion, as the best
the show has ever seen or are ever likely to see. He
had Ian in stitches all the way through with his one-liners, yet delivered his
wonderful gags in such a frivolously understated way that you got the impression
he wasn't even trying hard. Magnificent
performances each time. On his third
appearance, though he was still excellent, he made less impact, but that was
more down to the dominating presence live via satellite of exiled MI5 spy David
Shayler on the other side, so Fry spent much of his speaking time asking him
searching questions. But he is
undoubtedly the show's finest guest.
MARKS OUT OF TEN: Ten, ten and eight.
SHOULD THEY INVITE HIM BACK?
As frequently as the show and Fry's agent will allow, provided he is allowed to concentrate on mirth and less on interrogating the other guest.
APPEARED:
KNOWN AS:
Satirist and comedian who was one third of "The Goodies" before turning his hand to his other career in medicine. Now a team captain in BBC political panel show "If I Ruled The World".
INTRODUCTION:
Angus
said Garden began his career in the 60s when a new Labour government was rapidly
disappointing its former supporters, so they thought they'd give him a chance to
give those gags another run out.
BEST QUOTE:
On
his appearance with the Goodies on 'Top Of The Pops', Garden said: "We were
a bit nervous about going on 'Top Of The Pops' as sort of sad old men, and we
got there and found they were ALL sad old men."
ANECDOTES:
See above. Nothing else.
GIVEN A HARD TIME? No. There was a definite air of respect for him.
OTHER OBSERVATIONS: None.
COMMENTS FROM THE WEBMASTER:
Bit
of a disappointing one really, yet Garden, by way of paradox, was a decent
guest. It's just that his wonderful, subtle political satire as a regular
on "If I Ruled The World" showed that on another day he could have
dominated a show and reduced the others to hysterics a la Stephen Fry. He
was still a more than adequate guest, with a few good lines and his usual,
understated charm, it's just that we know he could have been so, so much better.
MARKS OUT OF TEN: Seven and a half.
SHOULD THEY INVITE HIM BACK?
My word, yes. The man is capable of putting in a display which would go down in the show's folklore.
APPEARED:
KNOWN AS:
Heart-throb comedian with an
innocent, naive but beautifully funny delivery.
INTRODUCTION:
Angus said Green was a bit fed
up of being described as a 'twinkly-eyed bloke-next-door' so please welcome that
bog-eyed woman from two doors down.
BEST QUOTE:
To fellow guest Brian Sewell:
"I love your accent Brian. I bet even the Queen laughs at it."
ANECDOTES: None.
GIVEN A HARD TIME?
When he described Angus and
Ian as 'eggheads', Ian replied: "Only in comparison!"
OTHER OBSERVATIONS:
One of the show's great pen-emphasisers.
He used his BBC biro in many a gesture to make his point.
COMMENTS FROM THE WEBMASTER:
Outstanding. Green is a
top-class comic, combining scathingly big gags with a wonderful, friendly
delivery and the whole studio, including the reputably aloof Sewell, adored
him. His quality shone through to the extent that Sewell didn't completely
dominate the show. Green knew the answers, was extraordinarily swift in
his one-liners and improvised in the banter fantastically, and in an episode
when Paul looked especially bored as much of the show discussed works of art
(not his specialist subject), Green crucially provided the bulk of the
non-elitist laughs. A great guest
MARKS OUT OF TEN: Nine.
SHOULD THEY INVITE HIM BACK?
Yes. It's been three years -
why haven't they already?
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