AD: So all the sevens, round two, as we delve into the archives and invite our
panellists to play not so much Where Are They Now?
as Who Were They Then?
Paul and Andrew, name names for one point, name the year for two.
"We do not want to have more and more opportunities which
give people fake fanta...fake kinds of ways of opting out of the excitement and
virility which we can find in a society which now offers so much to its young
people."
P: It sounded like he was going to say 'fake fanta'.
We must not put sham orange juice on to the British public!
It's Selwyn-Gummer isn't it?
AM: Well, with words like 'virility' it could be David Mellor.
P: Yeah.
AD: And what is he now?
P: What is he now?
AM: Environment Minister.
P: I don't know.
L: Same thing he was then - a pillock.
AD: Any idea what he was doing, or what year it was?
P: 1968.
AM: Rivers Of Blood speech, Enoch Powell.
I: Why?
Because Powell's sitting there?
P: Yeah.
I: I thought it was the nineteenth century wasn't it?
Certainly in black and white.
AD: Well, that's very well spotted Ian!
I: Can I have a point please?!
AD: The names in question are John Gummer, as he is now, the Environment
Minister, and John Selwyn-Gummer, as he was then, in 1967 on that piece of film
taken from the K-Tel video "20 Great Conservative Party Conferences".
John Gummer is best known for demonstrating the safety of British beef by
feeding it to his daughter Leonora, or Napoleon, as she is now known on the
ward.
Mr Gummer is the one minister John Major can trust not to have an affair as if a
woman's that desperate, then she's already shagging David Mellor.
Ian and Lee - dead or alive?
"Mr Speaker, the time will come when this Government will
tell the nation that it does believe in a one nation, er, concept, not just as a
philosophy but as a practical consideration and it will implement a one nation
policy it will have to override, even at the risk of a general strike or any
other sort of threat from the unions, their opposition".
L: Andrew Neil.
I: It's Andrew Neil.
AD: Yep.
L: And we reckon...?
I: It's the same year Engelbert Humperdinck looked like that.
L: Yep!
AD: I'll give you a clue.
It was when Dana won Eurovision.
P: Ah!
Erm...
PICTURED: Paul comes alive to ponder the Eurovision question...
L: 72.
P: 19...
AD: Ooh, Paul's suddenly come alive!
P: Well it's great - we've got a pop question!
I: It's like "University Challenge" nowadays!
P: 1969.
AD: 1970.
I: You notice Morton hasn't said a word in this round.
Don't want to mess up that serialisation do you?
AM: Well actually Andrew has had a hair transplant since going to New York for
his big show so this could well be last year.
AD: Has his big show gone well in the States?
AM: I think it's gone west.
I think it's not out here.
I: He's coming back though.
AM: With a vengeance.
I: For who?
AM: No, that was the quote.
He'll be coming back with a vengeance.
It was in the Sunday Times.
And as will the Princess of Wales, so they may be a double act - Andrew
Neil and the Princess of Wales.
I: Both coming back...
I & AM: ...with a vengeance!
P: Will they be like the two Ronnies do you think?
'And it's goodnight from me'.
(as Diana) 'Hello.
News just in - an elephant has dropped a ton on the M1.
Police are advising drivers to treat it as a roundabout'.
PICTURED:
...impersonates The Two Ronnies...
PICTURED: ...then reads the news in the style of Diana
AD: It was erstwhile Sunday Times editor Andrew Neil as a young Conservative at the Tory Conference in 1970. Neil recently left this country to try and make it as a TV presenter in America. When he arrived in New York, Neil is quoted as saying: "It's an advantage not to be English, but have a Scottish accent. The Scottish vowels are flatter and that makes them more understandable to Americans". So we look forward to Rab C. Nesbitt reading the news on NBC.
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