ANG: Much like heads of department at the office party, round three may be over-familiar, but what can you do? Odd One Out is the name of the game - Paul, your national treasures - Linford Christie; Queen Jecasta of Thieves; Clare Short; and Jennifer Paterson.
PICTURED:
Top: (L) Linford Christie; (R) Queen Jecasta of Thieves
Bottom:
(L) Clare Short; (R) Jennifer Paterson
J: Those were the days.
PICTURED: Jennifer
reminisces about days past...
P: Is Jennifer the only one who advertises those lamps you get from Liberty's?
ALAN: It looks like someone's ashes on your head there, doesn't it?
ANG: Wasn't that in your days as the Mermaid of Towermana?
J: Mermaid?
P: Who is Queen Jecasta of Thieves?
I: She's Oedipus's mother.
J: She ended up marrying him by mistake, didn't she?
I: She did. Tragic.
J: Everybody died or got killed.
ALAN: No, he blinded himself. He got the right hump about it.
J: He blinded himself, yes.
P: Did you ever marry your mother by mistake?
J: No!
P: Well you must be the odd one out then!
J: I must be the odd one out!
P: Clare Short was reunited recently with the son she had to give away when she
was...you know, many years ago. Linford Christie, I don't know...
J: Lost their sons? Lost their sons? Is that it - lost their sons?
ANG: No. No matter how many times you say it! I could give you a clue - it's a
sort of familial reference. It's the way in which Jennifer was described in the
Times recently.
P: Do you remember how you were described?
J: Oh, in the magazine?
ANG: I don't remember which part of the Times it was! May have been the
magazine.
J: Well, what's that got to do with Jecasta?
P: Well, if we knew how you were described in the Times, we might...
J: Mermaids? No, nothing to do with mermaids, Linford Christie's not a mermaid...
P: No, I think that's safe. He wouldn't be a good runner if he was!
J: He's famous for a lunchbox.
P: Famous for a lunchbox, but he's not famous for fins and a tail!
ANG: No, you were described recently in the Times as a 'grand-mere terrible'.
P: Oh, now what's this mean?
ALAN: Terrible grandmother.
J: Terrible grandmother. But I'm a spinster of the parish of Westminster. I'm
not a grandmother.
ANG: Exactly!
J: No. So they got it wrong!
I: Clare Short's a grandmother and she didn't know it. Jecasta was a grandmother
and didn't know it. Linford Christie's not a grandmother...
J: And nor am I!
I: Oh, he's grandfather and didn't know it! And Jennifer, you've got a secret
child who's here tonight!
PICTURED: Jennifer's reaction to the news that her 'son' has
come to see her...
P: Mother!
PICTURED: ...then Paul's reunion with his
"mother"
J: It's you!
P: How have you been keeping?
J: Very well! Very well!
P: Do you see much of dad these days?
J: He went! He went!
P: Did he?
ANG: Aw, sad isn't it?!
P: Never trust a coalman.
J: No!
P: Empty their sacks and off they go!
ANG: The answer is that they are all grandparents except you, of course...
J: Yes.
ANG: ... who was nevertheless described in the Times recently as 'grand-mere
terrible'.
Linford Christie was the only athlete in the British Olympic team who was a
grandfather. It's not quite clear what everyone else's excuse was.
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